Myth: Liners, Sliders and Scoops Chokes During the Playoffs

This blog does not approve of all these extra rounds of playoffs. Therefore, we come to you on the eve of the American League Championship Series, after the clearing of the dust of the LDS big-screen round.

A quick word on the Yankees, who I saw in person during their only postseason victory and, I must admit, whose demise I never saw coming.

Watching Game 3 from a bar in Chicago, I saw Kenny Rogers pitch the best game he will ever pitch. I don’t care that he once pitched a perfect game, what he did to the Yankees Friday night was pure Picasso. It didn’t hurt that the patient Yankee bats suddenly became as antsy as teenagers in line for fake IDs, and that they continued their impatience in Game 4.

But seriously, Alex Rodriguez has to go. It’s not that he’s a bad player: The guy is seriously one of the most talented all-around players in history. But he just doesn’t have the spleen or the tonsils or the testicular fortitude for New York. And Joe Torre, as great as he is, doesn’t need this crap anymore. He should leave. He should quit, not be fired. Firing a guy who in 11 seasons with the team has made 11 postseasons, won four World Series titles and six pennants would be crazy talk, even for the Boss. But Joe should read the scroll across the Yes Network: Get out while you can.

As far as the rest of the team, it’s time to downsize. They won championships with Mariano Duncans and Joe Girardis and Charlie Hayes’s and Shane Spencers and Luis Sojos and Miguel Cairos for a reason: Teams need interchangeable parts. They need spots that can be tinkered with, without a venti-sized ego bitching and moaning about the splinters in his ass from sitting down once in a while. And a younger rotation wouldn’t hurt, either. It starts with not picking up the option on Mike Mussina’s contract, even though I love the Moose, and also making sure they don’t trade pitching prospect Phil Hughes. Oh, and isn’t it about time they start looking for Mariano Rivera’s replacement, just in case his ERA ever bloats above 2.50 or something.

The truth is, the rest of the country doesn’t care about the Yankees. The rest of the country loves that the Yankees right now make the Titanic look like the Love Boat. I was in South Bend, Indiana Saturday while the Yankees were being eliminated, watching Notre Dame beat Stanford. The loudest cheer did not come on a Brady Quinn-to-Jeff Samardzija touchdown, but rather when the public address announcer said, “Fourth inning. Tigers 4….Yankees 0.”